Do you find yourself monitoring other people’s moods, worrying you have done something wrong or feeling responsible for keeping everyone happy? What we often call people pleasing can sometimes be rooted in something deeper: a nervous system that has learnt that other people’s emotions matter for our own sense of safety. This blog explores where these patterns come from, why boundaries can feel so uncomfortable and how we can begin to care for others without feeling responsibl

Why do we fear or avoid conflict? We may assume: • healthy relationships = no conflict • arguing = failure • someone has to be right and someone has to be wrong • the person who raises the issue is “the problem” These beliefs are incredibly common. In fact, conflict is one of the biggest themes that arises in therapy. It appears in many forms: relationship conflict, family conflict and the conflict we experience within ourselves when different parts of us want different thing

Anger is everywhere — in our homes, on the streets, in our politics. But what if it’s not just rage, but a signal trying to tell us something important?