Taking the Pressure Off at the End of the Year- Choosing Compassion over Productivity

December can be such a busy and demanding time of year for so many people. Many are navigating end-of-year deadlines, tax returns, and financial pressures of the season, often with the hope of earning a well-deserved break. Ironically, the push to get everything finished can bring on further stress and strain.

Alongside this, there can be the added emotional weight that often surfaces at this time of year with spending time with family, managing complex relationships, or dealing with feelings of grief, loss, loneliness, or simply a sense of “I’m just not feeling it.”

There can be an unspoken, and often unrealistic, expectation that we should somehow feel happier than we have all year, culminating in ecstatic joy at exactly 11:59pm on the 31st of December. For many people, that expectation alone can feel exhausting.

Then there is also the internal pressure that many of us place on ourselves, consciously or unconsciously, as the end of the year seems to invite a kind of compulsory reflection.

What have I achieved this year? Did I do enough? What will my New Year’s resolutions be?

Here in the UK, we are also at the darkest, and often bleakest point of the year. Daylight is limited even on sunny days, and long, drawn-out dark afternoons can feel heavy. Our bodies and nervous systems often naturally want to slow down, to rest, to hibernate a little.

That instinct makes sense when we think about it, yet this can feel jarring when an internal anxiety is rising, asking: Have I done enough? Am I where I should be before the new year begins?

For some people, this can feel helpful or even motivating, especially if ambition, drive, and achievement are core values. For others, this can send the nervous system into overdrive, creating a stressful and overwhelming end to the year.

So… how about we take some of that pressure off?

One way we might do this is by stepping away from a “business model” mindset, one built primarily on productivity, efficiency, and output, and remembering that we are human beings, not machines. This mindset often overlooks many important parts of us.

We can become hard-wired to believe that “success” only looks one way, usually involving long hours, constant striving, status, money, or recognition.

We can also reflect in a compassionate over productivity, relational human-centred way.

This can also help us refocus and feel more regulated. If you are feeling overwhelmed maybe just focus on one of these questions and allow it to float through your system through the day.

A Compassionate and Curious Reflection

What have I learned about myself this year?

Reflecting on what we’ve learned about ourselves can be incredibly valuable, helping us understand what we need to support wellbeing and inner contentment. It might be as simple as noticing you need more sleep, dislike being rushed, or struggle to open up to others or that you love running and reading. Acknowledging these insights strengthens our sense of self and understanding of who we are.

Where have I grown or developed?

When we measure ourselves only by productivity, we often miss meaningful growth. This might be slowing down, making space for hobbies, learning something new, saying no more often, being on time, or simply resting. These changes matter.

Where have I found connection this year?

Connection gives us a sense of belonging and stability. This could be with another person, a group, or even through a hobby or creative outlet. It might be a growing connection with nature, your local area, or simply moments where you felt less alone. Noticing where connection exists helps us understand what nourishes us and how we are connected to the wider world around us.

How have I been kinder to myself or others?

Deepening self-compassion often naturally increases compassion towards others. Acts of self kindness can be small but can be deeply significant, getting fresh air in the morning, making your bed, laughing more, or resting when you needed to.

You might also notice kindness shown outwardly: giving time to family or friends, volunteering, donating, checking in on a neighbour, or helping someone with child care. Take a moment to notice all of these moments. They count.

What am I grateful this year?

Gratitude can be a helpful especially when we slow down enough just to acknowledge what we do have. Finding even an event, a new friend or a weekend away that felt nourishing can be helpful. It may even be just being grateful for your job, your relationships, your home and your health.

What is my focus word for 2026?

Specific, rigid goals, like going to the gym five times a week or completely giving something up, can sometimes set us up to fail. Instead, choosing a single guiding word or intention can be much gentler and more sustainable, if you want one.

Words like health, connection, rest, or balance can quietly shape our choices over time, without pressure. It helps us know what we value even if nothing changes immediately.

And here’s an even simpler option: give yourself a break.

Many of us could benefit from being just a little kinder to ourselves. Seeing yourself clearly, your worth, your uniqueness, and everything that makes you you, may be the greatest gift of all.

So perhaps instead of worrying about this needing to be the most spectacular time of the year, we could allow it to be the most peaceful 🤍.

Wishing you all a peaceful holiday, whatever that looks like for you.

Thank you, 2025, for all you have offered and thank you especially to all the wonderful people I have had the privilege of working with this year.

And to those who celebrate, have a very Merry Christmas 🎄.

Much love,

City Solace Psychotherapy xx